This week marks one month since we landed on Dutch soil. Of course we still feel like foreigners, that might not ever change. But we are starting to make a life here. Jeremy is still getting to know his co workers and he enjoys his time with them. He can can see the neat things they are capable of. I am working a few online hours for Heartland Christian Counseling, the company I worked for in Iowa. Because I now have some time to exercise, I joined a local gym where I take part in classes and work on the exercise equipment. I also joined a Dutch language class. The instructor speaks nice and slow for me, and the two other women in the group are great. One is from Iran and one is from Ukraine. I have only had one class with them so far, but I am excited to go back. As I said, only one lesson so far, so please don’t ask me to speak Dutch yet. 🙂
I thought you might like to know what the culture here is like in general. Every culture has developed its own preferences I imagine, although I haven’t experienced a vast array of cultures. On a daily basis, I obviously compare the people around me to Americans, and there are a lot of things I really appreciate about the Dutch people. Some things I could do without. And some things are just different, things I have to get used to but feel indifferent toward.
The Look
In physical appearance, there isn’t much difference between the people in Goes and people in Central Iowa. In fact, I continually think that I see people I know on the street here. Lots of similarities. I actually think people in Goes dress a little nicer than Iowans. You don’t see the torn, ratty clothing or pajama like outfits that you see in Iowa. People leave the house in presentable, well in tact clothing. Even on teenagers. And I have been impressed with the modest clothing that women wear. Even on hot days, the women are well covered and presentable. Keep in mind, I have only been here a month.
Men on the street wear plain t shirts or collared short sleeve shirts with tan shorts or nice jean shorts. Women wear a lot of casual dresses, flowy dress pants or shorts and a shirt like I wear. I notice you don’t see a lot of t shirts with words of any kind on them. Americans like to wear t shirts with musical group names, sports teams, or vacation destinations. I have not seen this here in Goes. I took along several t shirts with English words on them. I didn’t wear them at first because I didn’t want to stand out. But eventually I thought it might lead me to a fellow English speaker who might eventually be my friend. So far it has not worked.
We all know that Dutch people are some of the tallest in the world, but not in Goes. There are some tall people, but like Iowa, they aren’t necessarily the majority. Jeremy and I don’t stand out with our vertically challenged stature. I have read that the majority of tall Dutch people are in the northern provinces of the Netherlands. Goes has a good mix since they are far south, close to the Belgium border.
I circled the location of Goes (Hoose) on the Nederland map. It is in the province of Zeeland, toward the bottom left hand corner. Belgium is less than a one hour drive south. England is to the west. Germany to the east.
Language
Since Goes is quite close to England, many people here speak both Dutch and English. The schools start teaching both languages in elementary, and have done so for years. And before they started teaching both in elementary school, they taught both languages in high school. So anyone under approximately 60 years old knows both Dutch and English.
It is amazing how quickly they can switch back and forth. Most restaurant workers or store cashiers begin by speaking Dutch to us, but when we reply in English, they switch to English. Sometimes you get a stubborn person who refuses to help you or make you feel comfortable, and they continue to speak to you in Dutch. I just say “Sure!” to those people and go on my way. But most people are willing to speak in English.
So yes, there is a lot of English around us, and the business or service people all know it, but the Dutch population only speaks Dutch to each other. Friends who see each other in the grocery store – Dutch. Everyone around me at the gym and in the locker room – Dutch. Everyone at the wonderful Outdoor Market – Dutch. Families chatting with each other in restaurants – Dutch. That is all you hear when you leave home. I don’t mind it, but I really want to know what is going on around me and be able to start conversations. I want to have something in common with the locals. And I don’t really want to always be the outsider. So, I signed up for Dutch language classes. Let me tell you, it is NOT EASY for this middle aged lady to learn a new language. But I am working hard and hope soon to be able to at least know what service industry workers say to me or how to ask for a coffee and donut at the bakery.
Once Jeremy and I went to a local bakery called Brood and Banket, meaning bread and pastries. Turns out, “Banket” refers to any pastry, not just the almond sticks I call “Banket” in Pella. We asked the lady behind the counter if she had any Banket, thinking we were looking for an almond pastry specifically, and she replied with “Excuse Me?!!” I explained that because the name of her store included Banket, we were looking for an almond pastry. And then she explained that all pastries that aren’t bread are “Banket.” We said ok and continued to look at the good, but she and two of her co workers were smirking and were TOTALLY making fun of us in Dutch. They went on and on, looking at us, yammering in Dutch and smiling. But only once has someone been that inconsiderate. Just human nature with some people I guess.
The people here tend to be very direct whether speaking Dutch or English. They say what they mean. In America, or at least in the mid-west, we dance around what we mean in order to save feelings or keep people from not liking us. There is a lot of guessing and wondering. The Dutch don’t dance around. For instance, I heard the grocery store cashier say to someone “You asked me if we had that brand. I told you no. Do you need something else?” Or my Dutch teacher telling me “No, you can’t ask strangers to pet their dog. We don’t do that here. Please don’t do that.” It is a little refreshing. There is no guessing what someone is telling you. You don’t have to assess whether they are trying to give you a hidden message. When you get past the shock, and remind yourself that they are not trying to be rude, you appreciate their directness.
Street Personality
In general, as a culture, the people here like to keep to themselves. This is something we were warned about before we came, and we found it to be true. On the street, no one is interested in interacting. I am not free to pet anyone’s dog or ask him or her how the day is going, or even say “Hello”. A podcast I listened to told me not to ask anyone at all “How are you?” Dutch people don’t do that. They wouldn’t know how to respond to that question. No one waves or even smiles at passers-by. Each person just goes about their business, moving on to where ever they set out.
Thankfully this includes angry or crazy people too. I have never seen anyone yelling at anyone else on the street, or yelling for no reason. I have not even seen an argument or a conversation between strangers. Not saying it doesn’t happen, but I have not seen it. People just keep to themselves. Period.
This extends to the store workers too. Not once has anyone working in a store asked me if they can help me. The workers don’t bother the customers. They assume I will approach them if I have a question. This isn’t true in restaurants however. Restaurant workers are much more hospitable and approach you when you walk in the door. The first week or two in the Netherlands, I liked to think of our waiters and waitresses as our friends. They were so nice to us. 🙂
As an introvert, I actually enjoy this about the public life here. I never worry about what to say to people, because I don’t have to say much at all! And I never worry about loud mouths, because there aren’t any. I always feel very safe on the street, because no one ever approaches me. All good stuff.
Still, Good People Here
Again, the above observation are generalizations. When you do get into a conversation with someone, you find many kind people.
I have experienced the kindness of several, some even strangers. Many thanks to the woman at the Outdoor Market who told Jeremy and I that we were more than welcome in Goes (I think because she heard us speaking English). But I actually appreciated that. Many thanks to the young girl in my exercise class who stopped her own routine to help me with the moves. I felt loved. And thanks to the fellow customer at the grocery store who helped me when I couldn’t figure out how to pay at the self check out. I appreciated her too.
And now that I have been at the gym several times, one of the trainers says Hello to me by name when I come in. Someone knows my name and takes time to say Hi! It is the little things in life.
And I have to give a shout out to my very first friend, a Dutch woman who knew the past Vermeer wives living in Goes. She is the best. She has taken the time to have coffee with me, answer questions about life here, and just be a friend in general. She has been a huge help to me in many ways.
The instructor and two women in my Dutch class have been very kind to this English speaker. I appreciate them. And I met a fellow gym member this week who asked if I wanted to have coffee. Looking forward to that.
You might wonder about attending a church here to meet people. We do hope to do that eventually. We have been told that there isn’t an English speaking church in Goes. The closest one is about 45 minutes away in Belgium. One day soon we hope to visit that English speaking church, and then eventually, when I know more Dutch, I would like to visit a Dutch speaking church. I guess that won’t help Jeremy, but maybe I can interpret some. So far we have been just trying to get acclimated to life here.
Other Things I Have Noticed
Just a few other things I have noticed about the Dutch.
There is a LOT of smoking. Whether it be cigarettes, cigars, vapes, or other things that are legal here, there is a lot of smoking on the street and at restaurants. People don’t seem to mind lighting up where ever they want. It reminds me of when I was young in America. There was a lot more smoking in public places than there is now. That is what it is like here. Mostly by adults, but a some teens smoke too. A podcast told me that only 23% of Dutch people have tried marijuana. That is a low percentage considering the fact that it is legal here. I don’t smell it on a daily basis. But I have smelled it a few times. At least what I assume is marijuana. I am no expert in how it smells.
I have not been in one store that plays music with the Dutch language. All the stores play what I consider American music. The songs are in English with American singers. Singers like Mariah Carey, Madonna, Maroon 5, Justin Timberlake, you name it. The radio stations we find in the car also play American music in English. I don’t have a reason for this. Just something I have noticed.
Dutch people seem to be more into fresh food than Americans. The food I buy here must have less preservatives because I notice it spoils quickly. Jeremy heard at work that the Netherland government has strict regulations on what can go into food. For instance, they don’t allow much corn syrup to be mixed into grocery store foods. The government tries to do their part to prevent long term illness like diabetes, heart conditions, or cancer.
Kermis
I am going to end this post with pictures of Kermis, a festival they have yearly. It is right here in the Center, between all the tall buildings. Kermis runs from 12 noon to midnight, this year being from August 8-15. It seems to be geared toward children, but it certainly draws many adults and groups of teens. We can see some of the rides from our deck, and the outside noise is triple what it was a week ago. Please notice the picture of poffertjes! There was a stand selling it so obviously we had to try it and compare it to Pella. Here it is much fluffier and cake like. And not as sweet as Pella makes it. But still good!
I remember Pella trying to have a Kermis festival on the square when I was young. It was for kids, and was mostly hide and seek games with small prizes. It was fun to me at the time!
Take care everyone! Until next time!
Awesome read. Glad to hear you are learning the language and personality of Goes people. Very interesting. Our son in law is a Friesian and they are very tall.people. They are way north from Goes.
Until next weeks blog~ have a good week. Sue
Hello Jodi, I enjoy reading your blog about your adventures in Goes. What a wonderful experience you are having. I’m envious. In case you are interested and the two of you are able to explore you might be interested in knowing that the Niemantsverdriet family lived in Charlois, Zuid Holland, for generations before immigrating to America. When 20 of us took the “family trip” in 2001, we met some distant family — and are still in touch with them as well as having “met” some others by Facebook since then. If you come across any Niemantsverdriet (or Niemandsverdriet or Niemansverdriet) you can be assured that they are in some way related to us. We attended the Sunday morning worship in the Delft Cathedral and they had earphones that translated the service for those of us who spoke only English. I lived in Marshalltown for about 40 years and can well imagine the differences and similarites you are experiencing! Have a wonderful time while you are there!
Carolyn Niemantsverdriet
carolynniemantsverdriet@gmail.com
Thanks Carolyn! I will look up that town and see how far it is from us! And yes I will keep my eyes open for Niemantsverdriets. It’s not a hard name to miss! Thanks for reading and for your comments!